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Saturday, September 05, 2009

Time to move on...
Hey yohz people!!! Gee, it's just so tired now, but still i gotta make this post, MUST!!!!! XD
Haha today i felt i ve done quite a meaningful thing! went over to Bishan Home to do a little volunteer, felt so achieving when every one keep asking me why do you wanna join us? haha all of them asked the same qn in different version:
"Why do you join us? Though people like you in ns should be enjoying on e Orchard Rd now lahz"
"Why do you wanna join us? There are like so many volunteer group ard lahz"
"Hey why do you wanna come? No friends ard mehz?"
I only gotta roll my eyes: first they think i'm a rich bimbo shopping Orchard Road every
week, Second they are so no confident in themselves and lastly is the worst, THEY THINK I NO LIFE!!!
Haha well, ok lahz, quite expected people will ask me this way lahz. Indeed really not much people in general will wanna join community service when finally it's weekends?!
But the reason I joined it's simply, maybe it's time for me to give something. Thinking so much so much, perhaps i've warned so many people about IMPOSTER SYNDROME, that i become a victim myself.


What have I been doing for my this few years? Have I been doing something meaningful into others life, or just simply mine?

when i looked at the vounteer leaders, her eyes filled with committment and focus. She's firm and determined in doing something she wants and i know she will achieve it.

Then what about me? Have i been doing good deeds to earn a good 'report card' for my life? I dunno.

Thinking of in jc, i can't help anyone much. The more i tries to help others, the more tired i becomes. Ended up after 2 years, many still haven't recovered from the hurt from their A level. Then i started to think of my ex, once I wish to help her for her A's, but it ended up screwing up everything, dunno she or i or mayb both, we were never happy since then. Now it's Anngi girl, living in her own dream which she own admits 'stupid' but i tihnk it's just selfless and senseless, and what i ve been doing all along is to thrash the dream that keeps her going. Mayb i should let her indulge in her own belief to clear A's first? Mayb i should let go.

Then like so far what good deeds have I done? Mayb it's gonne be a sub-pass.
Well, hope today pulled my 'grades' up a little, quite enjoyable though. Haha some faces seems so strange yet feels so warm lahz. Quite looking forward to the next sessiob next week.
Felt so relieved, maybe i'm born to walk alone. God bless the World, God love her please.